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Lord of the Princess Bride of the Rings

If you like campy crossover, you might like this retelling of Lord of the Rings in Princess Bride quotations. Sample:

The Inn of the Prancing Pony:
STRIDER: I am waiting for Gandalf! You told me to go back to the beginning, so I have. This is where I am, and this is where I’ll stay. I will not be moved.
[…]
STRIDER: I do not mean to pry, but you don’t by any chance happen to have a Ring of Power on your right hand?
FRODO: Do you always begin conversations this way?
[…]
HOBBITS: Who are you?
STRIDER: No one of consequence.
HOBBITS: We must know.
STRIDER: Get used to disappointment.
HOBBITS: Okay.

The Grey Havens:
SAM: What is it?
FRODO: Open it up.
SAM: A book?
FRODO: That’s right. When I was your age, adventures were called books. And this is a special book. It was the book my uncle used to write when he was adventuring and I used to write it when I was adventuring … and today, I’m gonna give it to you.
SAM: Does it got any sports in it?
FRODO: Are you kidding? Fencing, fighting, torture, revenge, giants, monsters, chases, escapes, true love, miracles.
SAM: It doesn’t sound too bad. I’ll try and stay awake.
FRODO: Oh, well, thank you very much. That’s very nice of you. Your vote of confidence is overwhelming. Oh. All right: “There and Back Again: A Hobbit’s Tale by Bilbo Baggins.” …

via Heretical Ideas

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1 Comment »

  1. Matt said,

    October 13, 2005 @ 4:17 pm

    yes… [grins] Though my favorite section was from fanghorn forest:

    MERRY: It’s not that bad… Well, I’m not saying I’d like to build a hobbit hole here, but the trees are actually quite lovely.
    PIPPIN: We’ll never succeed. We may as well die here.
    MERRY: No, no, we have already succeeded! I mean, what are the three terrors of Fangorn Forest? One, the orc that followed us in here. We already lost him. Two, the hobbit-eating trees which you were clever enough to discover what that looks like, so in the future we can avoid that too.
    PIPPIN: Merry, what about the T.O.U.S.’s?
    MERRY: Treeherders Of Unusual Size? I don’t think they exist.

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